Internet. Seriously. Skype for the iPhone is the stuff dreams are made of. Prior to now, I'd been paying AT&T $3.99 a month for the pleasure of calling my parents in Singapore on my phone---and then 14 cents a minute per call. This meant that I tried to keep the iPhone-made calls to emergencies only---you know, like that time my brother Tom was held at immigration for trying to enter the United States illegally---and used Skype for the rest of them.

This weekend, I went to Target with my friend May, and I managed to get out for under forty bucks. I never get out of Target for under forty bucks---hell, I never get out of Target for under a hundred bucks---so that was pretty unprecedented, I've got to tell you.

Are you one of those people who finds a song they like and then listens to it again and again and again, on a loop, ad infinitum, until their fiance threatens to leave the house forever, taking half the furniture and both the cats with him? You are? Well, wonderful! I think we'll be friends! 

Internet, I am going to show you a picture and you are not going to know what to make of it. I do not know what to make of it. I have absolutely no recollection of the sequence of events leading up to this picture, and I believe that the first time I ever even saw it, in fact, was last year when I unearthed it from my parents' massive photo collection. I'm thinking it was taken sometime in late 1995. Presumably at a point in my life when I was very, very, very exhausted.

This weekend was notable not just because it was Easter, but also because it was the weekend I finally did my taxes. I know, just squeaking in under the wire there, right? You may be surprised to know, you see, that despite my general Type-A neuroticism in most other areas of my life, I am uncommonly good at leaving important things until the last minute, particularly important things I desperately don't want to do. Taxes, of course, are both.

I decided last week to stop stressing about the wedding. Right about now, you are having two reactions to reading that sentence, aren't you? One of them is "Oh yeah, right. If only it were that easy." The other is "Aaaaaaand here we go, she's talking about her wedding again. I'm out. Wake me up when we get back to the cat with the fake diabetes."

Man, was the weather glorious this weekend. I don't know if you've ever been to San Francisco, but it's rare that the mercury tops 80 degrees, and when it does, the whole city comes out to play.

The first thing you should know is that I'm going to be giving away a pretty awesome prize at the end of this entry. No, it's not an evening with Brad Pitt or a lifetime's supply of cupcakes, but would you really want those either of things anyway?

So my Mario Badescu Seaweed Night Cream ran out and I was looking for something new. It's not that I didn't like the Mario Badescu Seaweed Night Cream anymore, more that I was just too lazy to order it, pay for shipping, then wait a week for it to arrive. My skin was looking parched and thirsty and---just between you, me, and the rest of the Internet---not unlike old shoe leather. I needed something now. 

I rather think I should win some sort of medal for how much falafel I've eaten this weekend. I can see it now: a nice big silver trophy that I can place on the mantel, something large and showy and arresting, with "Excellence in Falafel Consumption" engraved in a swirly font above a nice big "April 2009."

Today my parents arrived in the United States. This in itself wouldn't be anything out of the ordinary if it weren't for the addendum I'm going to add on to that sentence: for good. Today my parents arrived in the United States for good. 

Hey, remember a few weeks ago when I was obsessed with that one song and I played it over and over and over again until my neighbors threatened to evict me, and then in the comments you were all like, oh yeah, totally, I do that too?

1. Nobody ever regretted going to the gym. (My friend Ellen)

2. You can fool people into thinking you've been cleaning the house all day if you just spray some Pledge in the air before they get home. Also, have some onions sauteing in butter on the stove so it seems like you're cooking. (My mother)

3. Ask yourself this. Does this thing need to be said? Does this thing need to be said now? Does this thing need to be said now by you? (My friend Melissa)