Have you heard of this accent meme that everyone's been doing lately? (Incidentally, did you know that "meme" is pronounced "meem," because I won't laugh if you didn't. I didn't until.....ooh, about six months ago. Up until then, I was calling it—only in my head, thankfully—a "meh-may," sort of like "memo," I guess, which seemed to make sense. Not to worry, though; Sean used to think it was called a "mee-mee." Because, as he so succinctly said, "when you do one of those, it's all about me, me, me, me, me.")
Anyway! Over the last few weeks, there's been a thing going around on the Internet where people film themselves talking, pronouncing certain words, and answering questions designed to make other people snort uncomprehendingly and sputter "What? You call all sodas a Coke? How does that work?" (This one seems to come up a lot.)
I've watched a fair few of them and I've found them endlessly engaging; first of all, because you get to put a voice to a blogger whose words you have hitherto only read on the screen (most likely in a voice you'd assigned to them in your head), and second of all because I think accents are really, really interesting. For the longest time, for instance, I didn't realize that there were a whole bunch of different American accents—the Boston accent, the Southern accent, the Midwestern accent, and so on—because I just thought there was an American accent, and that was it. (I think a lot of people think this about English accents too, when really, there are a huge number of regional differences, even for such a tiny country.)
So long story short—although, as you will see in a minute, I am incapable of making anything short—I decided to make my own accent video (or "vlog," as the kids are calling it, which sounds like a Russian verb that would be hard to conjugate) because hey, I love a good bandwagon as much as the next gal. Let me jump on! I have nothing else to do tonight! (Actually, I had everything else to do that night, but talking awkwardly into a camera sounded more appealing. Which is to say, the other things I had to do were not very appealing at all.)
Unfortunately, my accent video is about six hundred million minutes long because I have a really hard time getting to the point—did you expect anything less from me, after these positively voluminous blog entries I write? Somewhere, Hemingway is rolling over in his grave to hear a person using five words where one would do, and not even doing it while simultaneously shooting a wild buffalo either—and so it is probably going to take you a while to watch, and, as such, you may choose to skip it entirely, in which case I shall not be offended at all. (It is just me TALKING, TALKING, TALKING. ALSO, MORE TALKING. AND MAYBE THEN SOME TALKING.)
If you are interested, though, this is what I sound like. Please ignore the points at which my screensaver comes on while I natter obliviously away and then try to fumble, panic-stricken, for the space bar so I can make it all come to life again, the combined effect of which seems to give the impression that I am having very short, very quick discos in my home office (light! dark! light again!), which I wish were true, but is not.
Anyway, here I am:
If you want to follow along at home (or make your own version!), these are the directions you're given when you make the video.
Say the following words:
Aunt, route, wash, oil, theatre, iron, salmon, caramel, fire, water, sure, data, ruin, crayon, toilet, New Orleans, pecan, both, again, probably, spitting image, Alabama, lawyer, coupon, mayonnaise, syrup, pajamas, caught.
And answer the following questions:
What is it called when you throw toilet paper on a house?
What is the bug that curls into a ball when you touch it?
What is the bubbly carbonated drink called?
What do you call gym shoes?
What do you say to address a group of people?
What do you call the kind of spider that has an oval-shaped body and extremely long legs?
What do you call your grandparents?
What do you call the wheeled contraption in which you carry groceries at the supermarket?
What do you call it when rain falls while the sun is shining?
What is the thing you use to change the TV channel?