More Reasons To Like Sydney

This is part two of the Sydney portion of our honeymoon, which for some reason I still insist on recapping, even though it happened, like, two months ago and no-one really cares. Part one is here, and the Melbourne portion is here. Also, there are lots of photos. Are you still awake? Oh good, let's begin.

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On our second day in Sydney, we decided to have a picnic on Bondi Beach. You've heard of Bondi Beach, right? Everyone in the world has heard of Bondi Beach. What's more, everyone in the world decided to go there the same day we did, and they brought along their mother's cousin's sister's friend's yoga teacher and also half their fifth grade class. This might have had something to do with it being the Festival of the Winds that coming weekend, which is when people get together and fly a whole bunch of kites.

By the way if you, like me, have the sense of humor of a 12-year-old boy and can't say "Festival of the Winds" without imagining people, you know, passing wind, rest assured that you are not alone. A news story we saw on local Australian television that night told of a group of Bondi residents who were kicking off the Festival of the Winds with a group fart. Yep, you read that right: to celebrate the beginning of the event, these fine citizens were all getting up early in the morning, heading down to the beach together, and simultaneously letting one rip.

(You know, at the time, I totally believed this news story, but now, writing it out like that, I'm sort of questioning whether I hallucinated the whole thing.  Seriously, I cannot read this paragraph back to myself without wondering if maybe Australia was just punking me with this. Can anyone confirm or deny?)  

Anyway, before we could begin the journey out to Bondi Beach from the city, we had to stock up on provisions, chief among them the awesomely-named Strong and Bitey cheese. This, as you can imagine, prompted many jokes of the "I like my men like I like my cheese" variety.  Well, okay, there's only one joke you can make like that, but still, it's hilarious, right?

Strong and Bitey cheese, sadly enough, did not turn out to be nearly strong and bitey enough for me, so for the rest of the trip I favored something called Mainland Vintage Cheese instead, which I recognized from having eaten it in Singapore, where we referred to it as Ancient Cheese, my mother once having mixed up the words "vintage" and "ancient" when asking me if I wanted some in a sandwich. Ancient Cheese is delicious, in case you were wondering, and way more strong and bitey than Strong and Bitey. Its downfall, however, is that Ancient Cheese doesn't do nearly as well in the jokes stakes. Let's try it together: "I like my men like I like my cheese. ANCIENT." Nope, advantage Strong and Bitey.

The other thing I wanted to show you was our receipt from that trip to the grocery store featuring our (male) cashier's name, which was so great that I had to record it for posterity:

Attention, expectant parents: isn't Kittikorn an excellent name? You should fast-track that one right to the top of your list. Be careful, though, because I think I might actually invent a product called Kittikorn soon, like maybe microwave popcorn for cats. It'll come in little paw-friendly portions and it'll probably be flavored with tilapia. You might want to store your Kittikorn away from your SmartPop, is all I'm saying. It would be pretty terrible if there were a mix-up.

1
Kitty
Nov 04, 2009

And people think my name is strange!

2
Susie
Nov 04, 2009

Thanks for the am chuckle to start my day off right! I like my men like I like my cheese, too!

3
KG
Nov 04, 2009

Holly, I had the same reaction as you when I read "Festival of the Winds". heh.
When dealing with the wonderfully laconic Aussie sense of humor, there's a 50-50 chance that the group fart story: 1. could be true, or 2. they were totally taking the p*ss. To continue the scatological theme, I would choose number 2.
I'll be traveling to Aus this December for the first time to meet my Tall Aussie's family; I think I'm going to like it there!
And I really enjoy your posts.

4
Sheila
Nov 04, 2009

I looked at the receipt and thought, "George. George Street. What's unusual about that name?" Which made the next paragraph incomprehensible to me at first. In time, I figured it out, but clearly I need some strong and bitey coffee.

5
Jennie
Nov 04, 2009

I'm not sure WHAT this means exactly -- perhaps I've been reading you a little too long -- but you've inspired me to picnic on all my vacations. I have begun bookmarking great markets and delis in cities I want to/plan to travel to, so I can enjoy a great picnic when there. All because of you!

6
soulfusion
Nov 04, 2009

Strong and bitey cheese!! I think I mentioned that in my recommendations. Or I should have. I'm sorry it isn't as strong and bitey as you would have liked. I may have let the name enhance the flavor in my memory.

7
Katie
Nov 04, 2009

Totally unrelated, I saw Tim Tams at Target! And I thought of you. Apparently Peppridge Farm is making them.

Considering my grandmother once ate the dog jerky treats, I am sure she'd be happy to be an early taster for your KittiKorn.

9

Are you sure Kittikorn isn't his LAST name? I know... lame. Disappointing.

10
Kristabella
Nov 04, 2009

Kittikorn! Awesome!

My bartender's name a few weeks ago was Jinxy. I had to ask him about it. His name is Jay, Jinxy is just a nickname, sadly.

11
Nothing But Bonfires
Nov 04, 2009

Oh man, Amber, don't burst my bubble!

12
serror
Nov 04, 2009

Strong and Bitey cheese!! Yay!

I think Kittikorn is a Thai name, but I think it is a first name not a last name!

13
Mon
Nov 04, 2009

I think Kittikorn should have been the emcee at the Festival of Gas. And pronounced all the emissions Strong and Bitey. Also, Kittikorn is a great name for a dog.

14
mischasone
Nov 04, 2009

Please keep recapping your honeymoon - I for one love hearing about your travel adventures. Especially Sydney as we are heading there next month.

15
Lisa D
Nov 04, 2009

Hey, I think this is the first time I've commented, but I've been loving your writing!

I'm still chuckling over your like of ancient men and the festival of winds. But clearly, what else besides flatulence could you possibly think of when you hear that name?

16
Leah
Nov 05, 2009

I think Kittikorn is going to be Simon's new restaurant name. (You know, the name they call when your table is ready.)

17
Nothing But Bonfires
Nov 05, 2009

I was thinking of giving it to the Starbucks barista every once in a while, but a restaurant name works equally as well.

18
Aneets
Nov 05, 2009

The news story was a send up- I saw the show you were talking about and the reported is a semi well known comedian here.

Would be hilarious however!

19
Nothing But Bonfires
Nov 05, 2009

Oh no! I can't believe I fell for it! That's hilarious. I totally thought it was true. Can we maybe blame my jetlag? My frazzled post-wedding brain?

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