Looking For A Theme In This Blog Post Is Like Trying To Find A Reason Heidi Montag Is Famous

Hi Holly,
I've been enjoying your blog for a while, so time to say hi!

My family had a little tradition of popping in at open houses.. just because we liked looking and not because we could ever buy. And now I've noticed that tendency expanding in my own life... last week I was tempted to attend an open day at a posh private kindergarten with my toddler, just because I'm curious to see all the facilities they have and not because I could ever send my baby there. We don't even live in this city, we're just visiting! I didn't do it.. but I did pop into a music school for babies to "get a brochure" just so that aforementioned toddler could plink-around on the mini piano they had in the waiting room.

Those cookies. Look. So. Damn. Good.

First, let me say that you are most definitely onto something in the t-shirt slogan department. And secondly, chocolate chips should ALWAYS be a substitute for raisins. (I don't trust raisins. They are a recycled, redesigned, repurposed food. Anything else spoils, you throw it out. Grapes shrivel up and die, they call them raisins! It goes without saying that I feel the same way about prunes. I'm just not as passionate about plums.)

And everything you described about Costco, same for Sam's. That's why we have a love/hate relationship. As someone who spent a weekend not so long ago buying/returning/repurchasing a twin pack of camis...I echo your pain.

The line about the small overly-dependent adult living in your apartment made me explode with laughter

i go to open houses here in manhattan sometimes. then i go home to my shoebox and weep.

Heidi who?

Part of the problem with Costco (or Sam's Club which is where I shop) is the scale of things. The store is huge, the cart is huge, all the packaging is huge so when you look at the eight pack of romaine lettuce heads in the store it suddenly looks... reasonable. This is because there is nothing normal size/scale to compare it to and even though some part of brain is screaming "it's too much" you chuck it into the massive cart and wheel over to the next free sample station. Then you get it home and realize "holy hell, this won't even fit in my refrigerator-what was I thinking" or you realize you don't even have a cupboard that will fit 22 rolls of paper towels.

Well, now you've done it. You've pissed off the entire short and helpless adult population. Luckily I am tall and fairly capable, so I will stick around. :)

You aren't the only married couple that blew a bunch of money unintentionally at Costco this weekend! We just went to look around and walked about $100 poorer 30 minutes later. Though the free brownie samples did help cushion the blow...

But really, as annoying as it is to have to return something and re-shop rather than exchanging it, I have to say that I love Costco's return policy - which is basically that they'll take anything back, no questions asked. I once had to return a set of sheets (that felt like sandpiper when I tried to sleep on them) and they took them back without batting an eye.

When I hovered over the food network link but hadn't read further into the paragraph, I was thinking, eww, she should have subbed chocolate chips for the raisins. Raisins are just not good in cookies. Oatmeal chocolate chip cookies = best cookies in the world. I mean, they have oatmeal in them, so you can kind of convince yourself that are GOOD for you!

I always always ALWAYS manage to buy a ton of things that are NOT on my list, including but not limited to 70 pounds of craisins, 200 granola bars that I don't even really like, and 4 gallons of shampoo that I will get tired of way before I actually use it all. They should have endurance training for people who are going to make a trip to Costco.

Kill me, I want those cookies so bad. The thing that grosses me out the most about Costco is those giant tubs of mayonnaise. UGH.

http://www.ifeelyaophelia.com
Jenna Jean

You could always rent a place with a second bedroom - I live in Manhattan and with the recession rents are WAY down. We just moved into an apartment that has a spare bedroom AND an office space, for the same rent we would have paid for a 1-bedroom last year. It's amazing.

Costco's return policy sounds exactly like Ikea's, which is a madhouse experience to begin with. I inadvertently bought the wrong slipcovers last year, and rather than simply exchange them for the right ones, I had to go to "returns", take a number, wait to be called, and then go back into the wild to pay for the new ones. It made me swear to never buy anything from Ikea ever again. Yes, it's cheap, but my time is more valuable.

You are too hilarious. I feel the same way about Costco. I have to have a list before I go in and NO I'm not allowed to go down the candy aisle! Or the movie aisle. Or the Christmas aisle!

I also totally agree about the House Hunter trifecta! The way people go gaga over double sinks is amazing to me. You're about to spend $500k on a house the most exciting thing is the double sink!? Hmmmm, maybe I watch too much HGTV.

Anyway, can't wait to try out the cookies, they look delish!

my husband no longer allows me to step foot in costco...because, dude, that place is DANGEROUS.

also? I am still baffled by someone returning cereal. FOR REAL.

When we were looking at houses we felt like total frauds, moments from being discovered and thrown out on the sidewalk. That might have been because we were not married, not engaged, had graduated from college a month earlier and had no money, but hey! We did buy a house! IN YOUR FACES, smug realtors!

Occassionally I go to an open house in our neighborhood -- the neighborhood WHERE WE ALREADY OWN A HOUSE -- and I still feel like a fraud. They're always so nicely decorated. Their furniture isn't all from Ikea. I don't think the I-don't-belong-here feeling goes away, unless you're one of those House Hunters people.

Costco Romaine! It is almost always so fresh-from-the-field that the stubs are barely beginning to brown. Just rinse them all at once when you get home, trim the bottom a tiny bit, let the stem ends all sit in a big bowl of cool water for a while until the heads re-hydrate and plump up, wrap each one in a paper towel and bundle them into plastic bags in the 'fridge -- you've got yourself a week's worth of salads for two. They stay far fresher than grocery store lettuce seems to, and if you get tired of salad, you can always slice a couple of heads the long way, drizzle with flavored oil of some sort and grill them. Super tasty!

Open houses in SF make me feel daydreamy and completely despondent.

I stopped going to Costco when I bought a 10 pound bag of pancake mix. No one eats that many pancakes.

I cannot be trusted there.

I've been spending at least one day of each weekend for the last 2 months going to open houses with my boyfriend. From all this I've learned:

a. Double sinks are must if you have to share with a man.
b. Granite countertops are lovely and kind of a big deal to me if I'm gonna have to do all the cooking.
c. Stainless steel is debatable, nice yes - but I'd take a soaking tub over them EVERY SINGLE DAY.

But that feeling of being over your head never goes away. Just for kicks we've gone to a few open houses that were not on our list (by way of signs) and ended up in $700+ homes that made me say "oooooh" and then hope the realtor isn't seeing straight through me.

So, last time I was in SF, my friend and I took an open house tour near the Palace of Fine Arts, NOT because we live in SF or live anything but paycheck to paycheck, but we were so curious. And then, spent the remainder of our day in the city figuring out which relatives had the most money so that we could knock them off and begin our life as heterosexual life partners, sharing a one bedroom flat with granite countertops and a lovely bathroom that sold for just under a million.
It was amazing.

This is what I'm allowed to buy at Costco:

Wine
Beer
Steaks
Flowers
Photo Products
Eye glasses cleaner (they'll keep refilling it for free, which is sort of magical)

And THAT IS ALL.

Why would anyone ever return a box of Honey Bunches of Oats? Honey Bunches of Oats is the best cereal in the world. It is like crack, I tell you, to the point where I even get cravings.

And those cookies look amazing. You clearly caught me at a time when I am ravenous with hunger, because now I want to go eat Honey Bunches of Oats AND cookies, neither of which are in the vicinity of my desk. Dammit.

I had to laugh about your Costco commentary. Last time we went, we spent over $500 dollars and only had two small boxes to unload. Meat = definitely worth it; giant jar of olives = not so much.

As a New Yorker I too dream of the potential of a second bedroom. So much so that when I was replaying a conversation with a boy I have a vague interest in to a friend yesterday we were trying to decide whether his statement about having a 2-BR on the Upper West Side was actually code for: I have a girlfriend who lives with me and that is how we can afford two bedrooms. I just have a difficult time believing a single guy has a 2 bedroom all to himself.
Also, I dream of having ready access to both a Costco and having a washer/dryer in my apartment.

My nickname for Costco (and Home Depot)is the "hundred dollar store" as in I can never get out of there without spending money in $100 increments. It's $100, $200 or (good heavens) $300. Only once did I walked out of there with a $21.00 purchase but that's because I only needed contact lens solution and didn't go anywhere else in the store.

I'm back. Can't stay away. Much like Costco...

@ geeky,
There is a reason they can do that. Once a company agrees to supply Costco with any product, they are assuming responsibility for ANY and ALL returns regardless of the reason. Most vendors will accept those terms because Costco sells so much in volume, it's worth it. After all most Costco stores have an average of 300 shoppers per hour and that's a lot of visibility.

I think the policy that vendors are liable for any returns is also why they don't do "exchanges" because then it's harder for them to itemize the count for how many were actually sold vs. how many were exchanged. If they say that 'x' number of items were returned, then that's it, the vendor or supplier has to take them back and compensate Costco for the product. It's simpler for them, but not for you. But even given that, I'd still continue to shop there--I've only had to return two things in 10 years of shopping there which is a pretty good rate of (non)return.

In addition to that they can, by your membership #, keep track of products you buy and notify you of any problems. We bought some light bulbs and had an issue with one of them. We took that one back but even then, they sent us a notice that the manufacturer had mis-rated them and if we didn't want any of the others, they'd take them back and issue a refund (even without the receipt).

Now that you've all gotten an unsolicited lesson about Costco's business practices, I shall now depart.

When I was a member of Costco, I always felt fortunate that I worked for myself and could go at opening time on a Tuesday and not after work or on a weekend! That being said, the anxiety I feel when I go in a Costco, has cured me from ever having to go push through the crowds of moms and babies, ever again. (I just go to Target instead)

Disclaimer: This comment has nothing to do with your post, although those cookies do look delicious.

As I was walking into Peet's this morning, I saw this guy I recognized and started to smile at him, but he was looking at me sort've blankly. (In a nice way, certainly, but with no idea who I was.) I was momentarily confused, but then realized that it was your husband and not, in fact, someone that I *actually* know. Oops. The internet really does make life more complicated, doesn't it?

Thanks for linking to the oatmeal chocolate chip recipe.

Warning: If you're going to open houses, even to "just look," get your finances in order and your loan approval NOW, just in case you fall in love with a place and know you simply must have it, and then you have to scramble through all that money nonsense in a few days rather than a few weeks/months, and you get so crazed your hair starts falling out, not that I know anyone that's happened to or anything.

I also know what you mean about feeling like a fraud at open houses. Perhaps it's because Simon likes to go to the ones for the multi-million-dollar mansions and it's always on days when I'm unshowered and wearing workout clothes? Yes, that's probably it.

Hey, how about giving us the recipe for that out-of-this world pumpkin bread dessert thing? I'm making that for Thanksgiving and eating it all myself.

This post had me giggling. Costco is the best!

My husband and I also love going to open houses...and we have no intention to buy either. Actually, we cannot afford to purchase a house (we live in CA too). Buying a house would mean that our mortgage payment would be twice what we pay in rent (at least). OH BUT HOW NICE IT WOULD BE TO HAVE LAUNDRY IN MY HOUSE AND NOT ACROSS THE PARKING LOT WHERE IT COSTS $2 IN QUARTERS TO WASH AND ANOTHER $2 IN QUARTERS TO DRY!!! :)

However, we DO have a second bedroom which is nice, but it is so tiny that every time I'm in there I think about how nice it would be to just remove the daybed & trundle (it used to belong to my sister, when she was 10 - my parent's gave it to us for free) and turn the room into my own personal office/yoga studio. It is nice to have a place for visitors to sleep, but most often we just use it as a cat room.

I am not kidding - I read this while I was standing in line at Cost Co waiting to return something! The woman after me wanted to exchange something so I had to listen to the guy explain the whole "return and rebuy" policy.

Luckily we went on a weekday evening so it wasn't too crowded, but I totally agree with you about the hell on earth that Cost Co can be.

I found that the best way to avoid the crowds is this: do not go on or immediately after the 1st or the 15th of the month.

We, too, put those fancy Henckels knives on our registry and no one bought them for us either! I guess everyone we know figured that now we are so accustomed to disemboweling onions with decades old knives that we inherited when we moved in together that they didn't want to spoil us with fresh sharp knives that will actually slice bread or onions efficiently.

And shortly after reading this post, what should I walk past but the knives in question!

I have done the same thing as you though - Fox was having a consistent problem with the packaging of their DVD box sets. I am not kidding when I say that three different boxes of the same set came with loose discs that were totally scratched up from rubbing against the plastic teeth that are supposed to hold said discs in place. It got to the point where I wasn't even being surreptitious anymore. As soon as the guy at the door marked my receipt with his Sharpie, I ripped open the plastic to inspect all the discs.

I've always been a sucker for looking at places. In high school, my friend and I would go check out model homes after school. We couldn't afford to buy concert tickets, let alone houses, but we still loved going to look. Living in California has made me realize that the American dream of owning my own home might not be possible if I want to keep living here. Unless I win the lottery.

San Francisco always has the most beautiful places, but the seven digit sale prices always put me off a little. I really do not know how anyone can buy a home up here. A few weeks ago, my husband told me about some low income housing out in Walnut Creek. For a single person, the maximum annual income was $40K but the monthly mortgage worked out to be more than a person with that salary could possibly afford. How is that even doable?!

It makes me understand why my friend moved. When he lived in LA, making almost $100K, he said the only place he could afford to outright buy was an apartment that he would have to rent out so he could assume the title of slum lord. Once he moved to the midwest, he was able to buy a place right away.

For the record, chocolate chips are always better than raisins!

I peruse that you aren't the only married couple that blew a bunch of money unintentionally at Costco, there are m,any more couples like me like to go to Costco.

Bit late to the party, but just so you know your two trips were not wasted: you cannot use the BB&B 20% off coupons on Henckels products! (or All Clad, or Wusthof, or any of the other really good stuff...)